how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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