Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
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