What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
They took my balls.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
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