I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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