Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I'm too high and old for this...
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
