is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
