You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
