just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
