i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Randomize
