: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
