i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
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