I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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