I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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