i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
