No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize
