I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
