I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Randomize
