Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
