i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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