JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
how drunk are you?
Several
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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