Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
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