I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
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