So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
