I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize