if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
