Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
