More tranny stories later!
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
