I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Randomize
