What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I'm too high and old for this...
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
