how can u be prego again
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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