My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
