My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
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