Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
