Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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