just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
is that a dick in a sweater?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
