but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize