My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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