im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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