Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
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