I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
