Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I have so many feelings about this burrito
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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