Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
The chlamydia really affected his face.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
