Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Randomize
