In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
We have started to decorate penises.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
