you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Randomize
