The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
