Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize