Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
