You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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