I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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